Ashley, there is something about the backpack remaining that really moved me.
You don't throw it away at the end. You put it back on.
And yet it doesn't seem to carry the same weight anymore.
It made me think that perhaps healing isn't always getting rid of what reminds us of where we've been. Sometimes we can return to the very thing that once held so much pain and discover that our relationship to it has changed. We can carry the memory without being carried by the wound.
But your final lines took me somewhere even deeper. The poem begins with everything the backpack—and you—had to carry, but ends with the recognition that He was holding all of it the entire time.
Maybe that is one of the strange gifts of returning eighteen years later: discovering that while you were carrying more than you knew how to bear, you were also being carried in ways you couldn't yet see.
And now the woman at 41 can come back for the girl at 14...only to discover that He had never left her there.
Ahhh thank you Kevin! Your response is poetic in it of itself! You are such a good write, gosh! Yes… everything you said, agree.
It was seriously crazy finding the actually backpack…. AND SO HEALING. I literally use this backpack today. I throw my computer, journal, Bible, and other stuff in it. I think back 20 plus years ago and can’t believe I carried that literally backpack on my back…. with all the “emotional things” in it.
There are so many layers to this poem . . . literal, symbolic, spoken….
Thank you for taking the time to read! I appreciate you!
Ahhh thank you so much Laura. It really means alot that you read my poem and commented. YES, they become one. Inner child and adult Ashley taking care of each other. Amen to amen.
Ahh thank you Teresa! Yes, He did. He so did. I look back and I am like, “wow Lord, you were so there.” He brought me out of so much. Thanks again for taking the time to read my stuff Teresa, it really means a lot. I appreciate you!
Ashley, there is something about the backpack remaining that really moved me.
You don't throw it away at the end. You put it back on.
And yet it doesn't seem to carry the same weight anymore.
It made me think that perhaps healing isn't always getting rid of what reminds us of where we've been. Sometimes we can return to the very thing that once held so much pain and discover that our relationship to it has changed. We can carry the memory without being carried by the wound.
But your final lines took me somewhere even deeper. The poem begins with everything the backpack—and you—had to carry, but ends with the recognition that He was holding all of it the entire time.
Maybe that is one of the strange gifts of returning eighteen years later: discovering that while you were carrying more than you knew how to bear, you were also being carried in ways you couldn't yet see.
And now the woman at 41 can come back for the girl at 14...only to discover that He had never left her there.
Beautiful, Ashley.
Ahhh thank you Kevin! Your response is poetic in it of itself! You are such a good write, gosh! Yes… everything you said, agree.
It was seriously crazy finding the actually backpack…. AND SO HEALING. I literally use this backpack today. I throw my computer, journal, Bible, and other stuff in it. I think back 20 plus years ago and can’t believe I carried that literally backpack on my back…. with all the “emotional things” in it.
There are so many layers to this poem . . . literal, symbolic, spoken….
Thank you for taking the time to read! I appreciate you!
This was so beautiful and poignant! I love how the backpack and you become almost as one by the end of the poem!
Ahhh thank you so much Laura. It really means alot that you read my poem and commented. YES, they become one. Inner child and adult Ashley taking care of each other. Amen to amen.
Wow! You so easily capture the feelings from high school, and He held it all!
Ahh thank you Teresa! Yes, He did. He so did. I look back and I am like, “wow Lord, you were so there.” He brought me out of so much. Thanks again for taking the time to read my stuff Teresa, it really means a lot. I appreciate you!
Is that sweet little teen Ashley?
My heart swells with these words.
Beautiful how you used an ordinary, everyday item to depict such deep emotion
Beautiful dear
Ahhh thank you Claire!!!! That means a lot!! I respect you so much! So words like this mean so much!
Beautifully poignant 🫂
Thank you Stephanie 🩶
Wow Ashley, just wow!
Ah thank you Sylvia!!
“a thread of Him was in sound as you stayed twisted in the world's merry go around”
soo good! 💖
Ahh thank you Caiden. I always love when you read my poetry and tell me what parts you like! 🥰